Tree Man (Les Carlson): "Now, you ain't gonna find no better tree than this here tree. This here tree is built to last. Ain't no needles coming off this here tree. (They look down at the pile of needles that fell off so he throws that tree aside) Okay. Now here's a tree. This here is a tree."
Mrs. Parker: "That's a little skimpy in the front."
Tree Man: "Well, you just put it in the corner."
The Old Man: "Haven't you got a big tree?"
Tree Man: "Yeah. Hell, this ain't no tree. Now here's a tree. This here is a tree."