Jay: "Whoa! What the bleep, Serpico? What'd we do?"
Cop (Ernest O'Donnell): "We got a report of two guys hanging around outside a store selling pot."
Jay: "We don't smoke pot, yo."
Cop: "No pot, huh? What you you use this for? (holds up a package of wraps)"
Jay: "What? I have a wiping problem. I stick those little pieces of paper up my brown eye and bam! No bleep stains in my undies. What, you don't believe me? Let me show you. Check this bleep out. Spread my cheaks so that you can see the bleeping stink nuggets."
Cop: "Pull up your bleeping pants, sir, now!"
Jay: "(farts)"