Jackie Moon: "And now, the moment you've all been waiting for. At six foot five, a solid, meaty 215 pounds, your pregame announcer, your owner, your coach, your pop-singing sensation, but most importantly your power forward, yours truly, Jackie Moon!"
Dick Pepperfield: "Jackie Moon always gives himself a fantastic introduction."
Lou Redwood: "Yeah, why not, Dick? It's his team, his money and his tunnel of beautiful ball girls."
Dick Pepperfield: "Oh, speaking of money, Lou, did you get paid this week?"
Lou Redwood: "No."