All wavs on this page were sampled at (8 bit mono 11Khz) and all mp3s on this page were sampled at (80kbs 44Khz).
202_answer.wav(32K) 202_answer.mp3(32K) 202_answer.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "If you don't feel fit to raise a child, then abortion probably is the answer."
202_bangbang.wav(55K) 202_bangbang.mp3(55K) 202_bangbang.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "The lights go off, and Mephesto gets shot."
202_bigbreakfast.wav(60K) 202_bigbreakfast.mp3(60K) 202_bigbreakfast.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Jimbo: "Calm down soldier, we need every person here to keep his head!"
202_bigfatass.wav(24K) 202_bigfatass.mp3(24K) 202_bigfatass.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Stan: "Dude, your'e a big fat ass, and you're mom's a hermapholyte."
202_bone.wav(97K) 202_bone.mp3(97K) 202_bone.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Yes, I can feel the needle scraping the bone inside..."
202_boss.wav(62K) 202_boss.mp3(62K) 202_boss.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Who the hell made Jimbo boss? Was it Barbrady? Chef? Mr. Garrison?"
202_cannabilism.wav(84K) 202_cannabilism.mp3(84K) 202_cannabilism.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Jimbo: "If a few of us must die so the rest of us can stay alive, so be it."
202_cantwait.wav(128K) 202_cantwait.mp3(128K) 202_cantwait.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Cartman: "I can't wait anymore, what am I supposed to do? "
202_castfirst.wav(63K) 202_castfirst.mp3(63K) 202_castfirst.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Who will the director cast first? Will it be Mr. Garrison? Officier Barbrady? Chef?"
202_compelling.wav(31K) 202_compelling.mp3(31K) 202_compelling.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "We're desperate for stories... and this one is so compelling"
202_competent.wav(97K) 202_competent.mp3(97K) 202_competent.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Mayor McDaniels: "Let's pretend for one second consider that we had a competent law enforcer in this town...."
202_conception.wav(35K) 202_conception.mp3(35K) 202_conception.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Do you know the actual time of conception?"
202_convincing.wav(68K) 202_convincing.mp3(68K) 202_convincing.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "I don't know, I may need some more convincing, huh."
202_diabetic.wav(53K) 202_diabetic.mp3(53K) 202_diabetic.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "What? Christ! Are you people diabetic or something?"
202_doggiebag.wav(30K) 202_doggiebag.mp3(30K) 202_doggiebag.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Cartman: "I'm bringing home some Eric Roberts in a doggie bag. Does anybody else want some?"
202_eateachother.wav(90K) 202_eateachother.mp3(90K) 202_eateachother.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Jimbo: "Our only option might be to eat each other to stay alive!"
202_eater...wav(234K) 202_eater...mp3(234K) 202_eater...m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Mayor McDaniels: "Yes, of course, nobody gives a bleep about Eric Roberts."
202_equal...wav(35K) 202_equal...mp3(35K) 202_equal...m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Kyle: "Whoa, dude! She doesn't have any arms!"
202_family.wav(39K) 202_family.mp3(39K) 202_family.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "America's Most Wanted isn't about violence... its about family."
202_father.wav(106K) 202_father.mp3(106K) 202_father.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Cartman: ".... Oh man, this is bleeping weak!"
202_fatheris.wav(72K) 202_fatheris.mp3(72K) 202_fatheris.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Cartman: "The father is someone in this room... the father is... Mrs. Cartman!"
202_fetus.wav(63K) 202_fetus.mp3(63K) 202_fetus.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Eight years old is a little late to be considering abortion."
202_focus.wav(59K) 202_focus.mp3(59K) 202_focus.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "We're doing the best as we can, maam. They've closed the pass..."
202_framed.wav(108K) 202_framed.mp3(108K) 202_framed.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Who Framed Roger Rabbit? Was is Jimbo? Mr. Garrison? Chef?"
202_freezypop.wav(106K) 202_freezypop.mp3(106K) 202_freezypop.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Stan: "Dude, you think if we hit him with a shovel he will shatter?"
202_furniture.wav(40K) 202_furniture.mp3(40K) 202_furniture.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "This story has everything! People! Furniture! Talking! It's a real American story."
202_goodmovie.wav(195K) 202_goodmovie.mp3(195K) 202_goodmovie.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Officer Barbrady: "Wow! This is a good movie!"
202_hands.wav(44K) 202_hands.mp3(44K) 202_hands.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Nurse, please! I need another pair of hands in here!"
202_heate...wav(215K) 202_heate...mp3(215K) 202_heate...m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "There's actually a nice heated walkway to it, so you don't need to walk through all that sewage!"
202_herma...wav(77K) 202_herma...mp3(77K) 202_herma...m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Mephesto: "You see, Mrs. Cartman is a hermaphrodite."
202_heykenny.wav(18K) 202_heykenny.mp3(18K) 202_heykenny.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Stan: "Oh, hey Kenny!"
202_improv.wav(167K) 202_improv.mp3(167K) 202_improv.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "No, no, my lifetime partner and friend, taken away in the wink of an eye!"
202_incision.wav(94K) 202_incision.mp3(94K) 202_incision.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Kyle: "Dude, you barfed in the incision!"
202_jiminy.wav(55K) 202_jiminy.mp3(55K) 202_jiminy.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "And the father of Eric Cartman is.. (BANG) Jiminy! I've been shot!"
202_juicier.wav(27K) 202_juicier.mp3(27K) 202_juicier.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "I have to admit, Eric Roberts is much juicer then I expected."
202_kidding.wav(13K) 202_kidding.mp3(13K) 202_kidding.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Cartman: "You've got to be kidding me!"
202_kille...wav(27K) 202_kille...mp3(27K) 202_kille...m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Kenny: "Oh my god, they killed Mephesto! "
202_killnext.wav(98K) 202_killnext.mp3(98K) 202_killnext.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Who will they kill next? Will it be Jimbo? Barbrady? The Denver Broncos?"
202_laws.wav(31K) 202_laws.mp3(31K) 202_laws.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Cartman: "I think you need to keep your laws off of my body."
202_lights.wav(86K) 202_lights.mp3(86K) 202_lights.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Who is screwing with the lights? Is it Barbrady? Jimbo? Or the 1991 Denver Broncos?"
202_metap...wav(53K) 202_metap...mp3(53K) 202_metap...m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Unless we get helped soon, all of these people are bleeped... metaphorically speaking, that is."
202_mileaway.wav(90K) 202_mileaway.mp3(90K) 202_mileaway.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "He shouldn't need any help, unless the power goes out. Who didn't see that one coming a mile away?"
202_minute.wav(71K) 202_minute.mp3(71K) 202_minute.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Cartman: "Man, this sounds like the longest minute of my life!"
202_mother.wav(94K) 202_mother.mp3(94K) 202_mother.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Cartman: "Wait a minute, if she's my Dad, then... who's my Mom?"
202_nogoingback.wav(64K) 202_nogoingback.mp3(64K) 202_nogoingback.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Mayor McDaniels: "Well, there's no going back now... we're cannibals. God save us!"
202_penis.wav(130K) 202_penis.mp3(130K) 202_penis.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Mephesto: "No, not exactly, but she did have a penis! (BARF!)"
202_perfect.wav(62K) 202_perfect.mp3(62K) 202_perfect.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "I sure hope I'm not Eric Cartman's father Mr. Hat. 'You can say that again, Mr. Garrison.'"
202_prefer.wav(44K) 202_prefer.mp3(44K) 202_prefer.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "We prefer to abort babies a little bit earlier on..."
202_pyramids.wav(80K) 202_pyramids.mp3(80K) 202_pyramids.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Who built the pyramids? Was it the Babylonians? Officer Barbrady? Summaritans?"
202_quincy.wav(42K) 202_quincy.mp3(42K) 202_quincy.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Chef: "I used to watch Quincy."
202_sacrifice.wav(314K) 202_sacrifice.mp3(314K) 202_sacrifice.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Kenny: "Kenny sacrifices his life for the patients on life support."
202_safety.wav(49K) 202_safety.mp3(49K) 202_safety.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Sheila Broflovski: "We can't even leave our homes for fear of our children's safety!"
202_sailaway.wav(331K) 202_sailaway.mp3(331K) 202_sailaway.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Kyle: "I'm sailing away..."
202_saythatagain.wav(69K) 202_saythatagain.mp3(69K) 202_saythatagain.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Mr. Garrison: "I sure hope I'm not Eric Cartman's father, Mr. Hat. 'You can say that again Mr. Garrison.'"
Mr. Hat: ""
202_shocking.wav(58K) 202_shocking.mp3(58K) 202_shocking.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Cartman: "Oh? Gee wiz? You think so, Mom?"
202_shortone.wav(88K) 202_shortone.mp3(88K) 202_shortone.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Jimbo: "Damnit, Barbrady! When you draw straws, you're supposed to have one short..."
202_shotcracker.wav(39K) 202_shotcracker.mp3(39K) 202_shotcracker.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Chef: "Doctor! We've got a shot cracker outside!"
202_sobriety.wav(87K) 202_sobriety.mp3(87K) 202_sobriety.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "An air of sobirety fills labotory, as the men of South Park gather to find out which one of them fathered this boy."
202_submarine.wav(27K) 202_submarine.mp3(27K) 202_submarine.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Mr. Garrison: "...like sailors on a submarine."
202_subtraction.wav(35K) 202_subtraction.mp3(35K) 202_subtraction.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Officer Barbrady: "I thought of something... uh, wait, that's subtraction."
202_surgery.wav(56K) 202_surgery.mp3(56K) 202_surgery.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "The doctor prepares the boys and Chef for surgery."
202_teamb.wav(306K) 202_teamb.mp3(306K) 202_teamb.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "...we will drink the cocoa and watch family programming until Team B makes it through the sewage duct."
202_terminated.wav(100K) 202_terminated.mp3(100K) 202_terminated.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Ok, Mrs. Cartman, I'll legalize 40th trimester pregnancies for you."
202_thankkenny.wav(81K) 202_thankkenny.mp3(81K) 202_thankkenny.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Mephesto: "I want to thank Kenny McCormick for sacrificing his..."
202_thank...wav(17K) 202_thank...mp3(17K) 202_thank...m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Mephesto: "Well. That's that. Thank you all for playing."
202_tnpspecial.wav(67K) 202_tnpspecial.mp3(67K) 202_tnpspecial.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Mephesto: "...say did anybody see that Terrance and Phillip special last month? Wasn't that the funniest thing?"
202_towel.wav(95K) 202_towel.mp3(95K) 202_towel.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Chef: "Don't let him bleed on my Meredith Baxter Birney memorial towel."
202_twoteams.wav(80K) 202_twoteams.mp3(80K) 202_twoteams.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Team A will consist of myself, Stan, Kyle, Eric, Chef, and Nurse Goodley. Team B will consist of Kenny."
202_unfinished.wav(95K) 202_unfinished.mp3(95K) 202_unfinished.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Cartman: "No way dude, I can't stand to leave things unfinshed. Its like when you hear that song..."
202_wakeup.wav(32K) 202_wakeup.mp3(32K) 202_wakeup.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Cartman: "Wake up you son of a bitch!"
202_wantedintro.wav(66K) 202_wantedintro.mp3(66K) 202_wantedintro.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Tonight on America's Most Wanted, a shooter is on the loose in Colorado..."
202_wantedleadin.wav(114K) 202_wantedleadin.mp3(114K) 202_wantedleadin.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Tonight, terror invaded the small mountain community of South Park, Colorado..."
202_washedup.wav(68K) 202_washedup.mp3(68K) 202_washedup.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "We were able to get him to play the part of the little monkey guy."
202_whatcost.wav(222K) 202_whatcost.mp3(222K) 202_whatcost.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Ned: " ...one day at a time... one day at a time."
202_whatright.wav(72K) 202_whatright.mp3(72K) 202_whatright.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Cartman: "What right do I have bringing another child into this overpopulated world?"
202_whereami.wav(88K) 202_whereami.mp3(88K) 202_whereami.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Mephesto: "Oh, I'm sure it was my brother again, he tries to shoot me every month."
202_whoshot.wav(109K) 202_whoshot.mp3(109K) 202_whoshot.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
: "Who shot Mephesto? Was it the school counselor? Or was it Miss Crabtree..."
202_wuss.wav(42K) 202_wuss.mp3(42K) 202_wuss.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Cartman: "Yeah, stop being a wuss!"